Saturday, 26 November 2011


This Guest Post is by Dioclese, who won DeadPool2

Neighbours are cunts. No - not those Neighbours, my fucking neighbours!

Their dogs piss on my plants, they park their cars on the pavement in front of my door, try to steal my garden ornaments, drop oil on our drive and generally behave like a bunch of self-opinionated, egocentric fucking arseholes.

And they've all got big houses on 110% mortgages, flash cars on the never never, maxed out credit cards, and important jobs. Well, I'm glad the cunts are important at work because they're fuck all round here.

And when I complain, it's my fault their dogs have nowhere else to piss, my fault that they have to pay for the car park next door. It's always my fault whatever they do, the cunts. The other day one of the cunts came banging on my door because I complained he'd parked in front of my garage door and I couldn't get my car out. Apparently that was my fault because he couldn't find anywhere else to park! Then the cunt told me that all my neighbours hate me and I should fuck off and live somewhere else. Well, fuck him, the cunt! Fuck 'em all. I'll stay here and outlast the bastards.

But what really gets me about these cunts is that they all think I should care what they think of me, but they don't give a flying fucking fuck what I think of them because I don't fucking count. What a bunch of cunts! 

Nominated by Dioclese

Matt Lucas and David Walliams

Matt Lucas and David Walliams are cunts. They are not as funny as they think they are.

Matt Lucas is a homophobic pigugly queen who would normally only live in a dark room of a seedy gay bar in East London, and David Walliams has a bit too much fun dressing up as women and showing his ass to everyone and licking old bints' feet. In interviews they always tell each other how super hilariously funny they are.

Well, sorry, you are on my cunt-radar for having only one joke (gays and fat people and poor people and transvestites are funny, well, not necessarily, as you cunts keep demonstrating). Come fly with me to cunt-hell.
Nominated by bobolala

Guy Verhofstadt

Guy Verhofstadt is a slimy Belgian, who sits in the European Parliament thinking he is the dogs bollocks...except for one thing, he isnt, he is a cunt.

...also he looks like Ken from Citizen Smith, I liked Ken though, not that bastard. He also looks like every other Belgian on the planet, which means your children arent safe as he'd lock them in a cellar.

Then kill them.
Nominated by danidiot

Angela Merkel

Angela Merkel...Barge Arsed, Badger faced, Ice Fannied Teutonic Cunt.

Spending her time and Germanys money to buy a new Reich.

All that and she probably gives Cameron a good tug each time they meet.

A proper sly Cuntmunter


Friday, 25 November 2011


Cybermen, what a total bunch of Intergalactic Cunts.

Scary? My arse, fucking useless monsters of the first degree.

Looked like the BBC grabbed the local pissheads, gave them some tins of special brew to neck down then covered them in tinfoil and stuck a hoover on their backs.

Fucking rubbish spastic Cunts.


Kitty Brucknell

Kitty Brucknell from X-Factor is a freaky cunt
Nominated by King Binge

Ricky Gervais

Ricky Gervais is a plagiaristic, should be sued for nicking ideas of others, fat ex-new romantic eyeliner wearing, double chinned Simon Cowel look a like spastic, bum boy stephen marchant loving, Celebrity arse hole licking, as funny as a dose of tetanus, piggy eyed, penis faced, pot bellied fucking arse holing wanker cunt prick of the highest order.

And, no cunt has nominated him yet so I fucking will. I wouldn't piss on your coffin, and I'd get more entertainment from watching fuckin' Dulux drying!
Fuck off Gervias you cunt!

Nominated by HurlingDervish


Who the fuck do FIFA think they are to tell us not wear poppies on football kit. Those Nazi loving, corrupt, bribe taking, Jew hating cunts would not be in a position to dictate anything if brave British soldiers had not lost their lives liberating Europe from the Third Reich.

Ungrateful cunts. How fucking dare they insult their liberators.

Can someone take that obese cunt Septic Bladder outside and stone him to death.
Nominated by peter

Nicolas Sarkozy

Nicolas Sarkozy is an ungrateful French Cunt who spends his day sucking German Cock whilst telling his country's liberators, the Brits, to Fuck Off. Today on armistice day we remembered those who were killed liberating his county TWICE from German occupation. Does he remember, does he give a fuck?

No he is too busy setting up a new Vichy Government for the Fourth Reich run by Angela Mengle/Merkel.

What a waste of British blood to allow a cunt like him to exist.

Nominated by peter

Brodie Clark [2]

Brodie Clark, what an untrustworthy,incompetent, sly, Vulcan eared, pointy chinned Cunt of the first order.

Lets all the shit of the Universe into the UK but its not his fault. Remember the Whitemoor Prison Inquiry where you could not tell the truth?

You lying bastard, lets hope you get royally butt fucked this time. Fucking Cunt.

Nominated by Carole Upshall

Robbie Keane

Robbie Keane.....hateful pisshole-in-the-snow eyed, diving, sly handballing, cheating, pleading for players to be booked, roll and fire an arrow fuckwitted spide, I've always supported every team that wants to sign me cunt
Nominated by bob rocks

Lord Taylor of Warwick

Lord Taylor is a thieving lying old Tory cunt who got away with a cushy prison sentence only to walk straight out into the House of Lords again!

By all accounts another Jeffrey Archer! When is this fucking country going to get its act together and stop letting these bastards get away with robbing us all blind...(give me fucking strength!)

Nominated by EDDIE-F

Occupy Exeter

"Occupy Exeter" bunch of wannabe cunts, here's their Blogspot homepage

Go on, tell them what you think cunters.

Nominated by banned

Seth McFarlane

Seth McFarlane (Family Guy, American Dad other boring shit) is a repetitive paedophile cunt.

All his stories contain babies or really young kids. What a fucking nonce.
Plus all the series he has a hand in are fucking shit, stereotypical, boring, as unfunny as an Eddie Murphy movie.

The yanks don't even want his shit, so like the twats we are we end up paying for this shit out of our license fee only for it to end up on bloody channel BBC 53 or whatever graveyard shit channel it is.

The prick probably costs me a fucking pack of fags every week.

Rancid cunt.
Nominated by Hurling Dervish

Internet Explorer

Internet fucking Explorer, a proper Cunty fucking program devised by a proper bunch of Cunts.

Upgrade this you Microsoft bastards.

Thursday, 24 November 2011

Jimmy Saville

Jimmy Savile is a dead disturbing cunt.
Nominated by cuntstable cuntbubble

Mary, Queen of Scots

Mary, Queen of Scots: Queen of Cunts more like. Lacked morals by being another Jock cousin shagger and even married a bastard Frenchman.

Only the thick as fuck Jocks could think that a God bothering Swamp pig of a woman was a martyr.

Charles Dunstone

Charles Dunstone the chief executive of TalkTalk/Tiscrapi as a 110%, gold plated CUNT. I'm sick of his shite "communications" company throttling my bandwidth to sub dial-up speeds. And as for the jokingly called "tech support" - they couldn't diagnose a child's abacus.

I hope he dies a slow and painful death...
Nominated by microdave

Downton Abbey

The entire cast, crew and writers of that kaleidoscope of cunts that is 'Downton Abbey' for a Daily Mail sanctioned fucking upper class ridden pile of steaming fucking donkey turds.

A cavalcade of racist, sexist, ageist and just about any other 'ist' you can care to mention.
Nominated by HurlingDervish

Roscoe Conkling "Fatty" Arbuckle

Roscoe Conkling "Fatty" Arbuckle is a silent Film star type of Cunt. He was the original OJ; a fat, unfunny Yank and a murdering rapist who got off due to his fame and immense fucking gut.
Anyone with a name like Conkling deserves to be fucking Cunted. His parents were obviously a pair of typical American retards

Vince Cable [4]

The Cunishness of Vinnie "cunt of the coalition'" Cable knows no bounds. It appears that Her Majesty's secretary of State for Business does not know how to fill in a tax return. What a thieving cunt he is. Maybe he is actually Scottish as that might explain it.
Nominated by peter

David Sexton

David Sexton is a nasty, authoritarian, control freak of a cunt with such a phobia of seeing so much as a wisp of tobacco smoke, let alone a smoker enjoying themselves, that he wants to shit on private property and ban smoking in the car you own and the house you call home.

And then, because he's also a stupid cunt who hasn't thought about how happy it would make the smugglers, he wants to outlaw smoking altogether.

He's a cunt, did I mention that?
Nominated by Angry Exile

Paul Stewart

Strathclyde Fire and Rescue Service group commander Paul Stewart is a murdering cunt.

"The operation had a ‘successful outcome’"

Yeah, and the poor lady died, because a jumped up tosser started spouting 'Elf and Safety bollocks...
Nominated by Microdave

Friday, 4 November 2011

David Cameron [10]

We should have a referendum on whether DAVID CAMERON is a cunt or not, but unfortunately the Fourth Reich loving cunt won't let us have one!
Nominated by Dioclese

Abu Izzaden

Islamic Shitpot Abu Izzaden, after doing time for supporting Terrorist Organisations, now wants to die like a suicide bomber. Well I can help the bastard with that wish.

All this when the scrounging fucking Cunt is drawing the bastard dole. Typical workshy hate spouting Islamic Fucktarded Cunt.

I bet he only wears that rag on his fucking peanut bonce to hide the fact that he is a slapheaded cunt as well.


Emperor Hirohito

Emperor Hirohito aka Untrustworthy slinty eyed yellow fucking Cunt.

Head speccy four eyed Jap bastard during WW2 and responsible for the starvation and brutalisation of hundreds of thousands of people. Shame the dipshit Yanks did not stretch his scrawny fucking yellow neck and have him dangling from a rope.

A proper nasty historical Cunt

His wife was a pig ugly fucking munter as well.

Thursday, 3 November 2011

John Barrowman [2]

John Barrowman - sure he swings both ways and all that. But fucking having the gall to come here to the UK and hoist his flaccid acting and 'singing' career on us all is unforgivable. Plus, you can't turn on the telly these days without seeing his fucking joker like grinning rictus leering out of the screen at you in all it's teeth whitened glory. I'm not going to do any queer jokes 'cos all you cunts will proper do that.
He's a US expat Colgate advertisement of knobshining cunt. Sorted!
Nominated by Hurling Dervish

Frankie Cocozza

Frankie Cocozza is a highly objectionable cunt, with brains so small he thinks a good look is wearing absurdly tight purple leggings last seen in the 16th Century on a court jester, and hair so lank its probably been washed in gerbil poo and cheap margarine.
Nominated by King Binge

Billy Bragg [4]

 Billy Bragg...simply for this photograph
Nominated by danidiot